15 October 2013

Slacker Smoothie

Most days, I skip showering without realizing I'm skipping showering. I wearily grab the day's outfit out of the nearest laundry bin of clean but unfolded clothing. This morning, after a confusing conversation in which an elderly woman at the supermarket asked if I was okay, I pulled out a compact and realized I'd slept with mascara on and not consulted a mirror before leaving the house. It was an all-time low for me: pushing a double buggy around with raccoon eyes. Bad ones. 

Maybe this is the beginning of Letting Myself Go. Maybe it's a short-lived phase. 2010 Jess (before kids) would have been curled up in a ball for the rest of the afternoon, completely ashamed. No, wait, this NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED to 2010 Jess, under any circumstances (unless we're talking natural disaster or imprisonment). October 2013 Jess is too tired to care. She shrugged, said "Nee, dank u wel.", cleaned up with her hoodie sleeve, grateful that the hoodie, too, was black, and walked off mostly unfazed.

Although I needed desperately to use the third person to distance myself from this monstrosity, peering out at produce through black-ringed, slightly bloodshot eyes, I'm filled with good feelings, too, like gratitude and the overwhelming need to laugh. My children had been gazing up at that Halloween-mask face all morning with shiny eyes and smiles, completely oblivious. Maybe it wasn't tiredness that nullified my shame.

Needless to say, I'm currently in no state to be making proper smoothies every day, with a blender and frozen fruit and creative thoughts and a smile. Some mornings, I need a quicker boost. This simple little number is pretty and thick enough to fool someone into thinking they're drinking something fancier than juice. And before you judge the green, shut up and try it. 

slacker smoothie
  • 1 cup/250ml of your favorite juice (I love orange, grapefruit, and cranberry!)
  • 1/4 cup/60ml plain yogurt (the pourable kind, of any fat content)
  • 2 teaspoons wheatgrass powder
Pour the yogurt into the juice, scoop in the wheatgrass powder, admire the shapeshiftiness and beauty, stir until blended, and drink. I prefer using a straw. Maybe the green wouldn't get stuck in teeth, but after this morning, I'm not taking any chances.